Not Everyone Wants to be Skinny

Imagine this...

You've been a member of the thickalicious club your entire life. You have lived happily and healthily in your skin for all the years you've walked the Earth, but you decided that you wanted to prioritize your health and have more energy, so you started to make some lifestyle changes. Now you make healthier food choices and you get your body moving every day. 

You are feeling amazing! 

You've been rocking this new healthy lifestyle for about a month now, and you're feeling particularly strong one day, so you decide to go out for a run. You have never run for any reason other than because you were in a hurry, so this is a major milestone moment for you in your health journey. 

Sneakers laced, headphones in and Bad Bunny's Yo Perreo Sola playing in your ears, you set your timer and take off. 3 minutes later, the timer goes off and you slow down to a jog, breathless at the street corner, and notice that you are donning a smile from ear to ear. 

You did that! 

...then a stranger slows down her car near you. You don't recognize the vehicle, but the woman is rolling her window down like she's coming to speak to you, so you take out your earbuds to find out what she needs. 

"Are you trying to lose weight?" the stranger asks. 

"Um, no."

"Well, you really should." she responds, reaching into her pocket for a business card and handing it to you while spewing off her elevator pitch about the amazing products that she's going to sell you that will change your life. 

You take the card, and pick your jaw up off the ground because you are dumb-founded. Flabbergasted. Utterly and completely SHOCKED. 

...this is not a make-believe story. This really happened to a friend of mine over the summer. This woman whom she'd never seen before in her life pulled her down from the cloud she was bouncing on after completing her first, short run and basically told her that none of what she was doing really mattered because she was still rocking thick thighs. 

If you think there's nothing wrong with this, you should stop reading now because I'm about to get on a whole soap box. 

THIS IS NOT OK. 

If you feel the need to comment on the health habits and lifestyle of others, please just don't. I don't understand what would compel a woman to tell another woman, especially whom she's never even met, that she needs to lose weight. I'm the biggest hustler I know, and I'm all about promoting your passion and telling the whole world about your talents but that's NOT what this was. This incident, and the many variations of it, are what's known as Body Shaming, and it's unacceptable. 

Friends, if it isn't clear, allow me to make it so: the intention behind my posts about health and fitness is not to make you believe there is something wrong with you. I understand, respect and preach that not everyone wants to lose weight. In fact, weight loss should never be the goal. If it is, your journey won't last. A number on a scale isn't going to make you magically love the person you see in the mirror. This journey is just as much about what's happening in your mind as it is about what's happening in your body, but that's a whole different topic for a whole different post.

The point of THIS post is to bring to your attention the fact that not everyone wants to be skinny. There are many people who don't look the way that society says they should and they are happy, healthy and fulfilled. If you're one of the people who thinks skinny is the only way to be, check yourself. And if you're one of the people who's been shamed into believing this lie, please recognize it as exactly that. 

The goal is not to lose weight, or even to be skinny. The goal is to feel good and strong in your own skin.